Please Laugh... Please

Watch, and be ready to be rocked!!

http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=q2NRq11EDAQ

If it weren't for SPANX

I wouldn't have attended church today. I felt frumpy and with the impeding passing kidney stone, I know I am retaining fluid and the ache in my right kidney is the all too familiar signal that I'm due to "give birth" without having a baby....

*ARGH*

On a much happier note... I'm legit! I have a real computer desk now!!! YES! SCORE! My friends, the Careys gave me one they had sitting in their garage, and IT'S LOVELY! Far nicer than anything I have ever had before... I love it.

Now working from home with my own corner, my own space, my own table... IT'S FANTABULOUS!

I'm getting my house put together as my mom is coming in tomorrow morning. I have a few things I need to do after the kids are sleeping, like fold and put away laundry, clean the toy room, etc. Those chores just don't happen while my children are even the slightest bit concious! It's all so strange to have my mom in MY home... my OWN home... not a rental! I just am so excited to have this...

Grace turns 7 on the 3rd. It kind of hit me that I was going to have to plan a baptism in another year... Time has just flown by... I don't know where it's gone.

I've better get my buns going because I have stuff to complete.

Au'revior - or something like that....

Just because....

I'm the coolest girl ever, I decided I would re-write the blogs I lost last week in error. One I remember was on... Yep, the UNIBOOB! That horrible thing that happens when you wear a sports bra? You know - it's the tube boob too? I committed that crime of fashion last week and really didn't care who saw me... I was on a mission to return the dog we adopted from the pound who was biting my children and I was going to be cleaning. Who needs to look fierce for that?! Come on now!

What else...?

Oh, I have been doing nails here lately. It's wierd because it's kind of like riding a bike getting back on track with the nail industry. It all comes back to you eventually... I acutally think I'm doing okay now.

We have company out the wazooo this week... it will be interesting to see how it affects my blogging capabilities.

*desperation talk*
must......

write.....

blog......

*gurgles*

*dies*

LOL

Today I had a Uni-Boob....

I FOUND I COULD RESSURECT MY UNI-BOOB POST!!! IT SAVED IT!!! HA! Here it is...

Let me explain. Uni-boob is that thing that happens when you wear a sports bra and have just one long boob.... not two individuals. Upon arriving at home and realizing I had a Uni-Boob... I had to change. I repent here, before God and my friends, for committing such a fashion atrocity.



That will be all.

The Fierce Shoes I Bought

So, I went to Dillards to get more linens for the house on previous said awesome deal I got on the first set. On my way to linens were the summer blow out shoes or something like that. I bought the fiercest sets of shoes I could find... The silver ones are actually an awesome shade of blue - and the striped MADONNA ones are black, grey, and white. It's amazing what good shoes can do for a woman!

MEEEOOOOWWWWW

Loving People....

Helps me love myself. I've felt like for a long time, I wasn't able to be myself, I was hiding from the fun, free, outspoken person I was once.

I have been in Idaho for 6 months and I've got some of the best friends. They're ecclectic, but so are my shoes... My shoes are an extension of me but they fit me so good... I have a few close friends here that I wouldn't trade for anything. They're like a good pair of sneakers... the comfort and support you need... I have a few others that are probably like my Tribeca high heel Madonna shoes, but to that, you add glamour, fun, life, depth, and enjoyment while on this journey of life.

I'm working on getting myself put together. Emotionally first. There's stuff I think I need to release to really move on and be the best me. Honestly, it could take counseling to get through it but if that is what it takes, really, I'm okay with that. I think once the emotional part is cured/healed.... the rest will fall into place.

I forgot what I was going to write about today...

Hey Amy - if you read this... I needed your visit yesterday too... you're too fabulous to feel frumpy... I'd take you any day of the week!!

I suppose that's it.

*hushes*

I'm on TV... err the internet

http://current.com/items/89038857_i_m_a_video_game_junky

What do you use your toothbrush for?

Most people use it to brush their teeth, detail clean, swab the deck of a military ship...

When I don't feel good, eat too much, or have sour stomach, I use to to puke. My eating disorder has been haunting me much here lately as I am not losing weight and feeling fatter every day. It's really starting to creep up on me faster than ever. I've noticed though, that the more stress I carry, the more likely I am to contemplate the eating disorder. Possibly because I can control what I eat and what I choose to throw up and can control little else anymore?

I had an email from Richard Simmons... yes, I am serious. This is what I got from him June 19, 2007:



Amy.
I want you to keep those Weight Watchers meetings going and to KEEP FIGHTING to win this war with your weight. I do believe you CAN do it! If you really WANT to lose this weight, then you really CAN lose it!

What you need or, I should say, WHO you need most of all to WIN this fight is YOU! It's THAT simple. Successful weight-loss is all about your making important LIFESTYLE changes. And that's where YOU are right now. Get ready to prove yourself TO yourself!

It's TIME, once and for all, to turn the frustration you have with your weight into the DETERMINATION you need to LOSE it. You have GOT to decide how much losing this weight means to you and get ready to lose it ...NOW! It's all about how much TIME you are willing to spend and how much WORK you are willing to do. And that's only as impossible as you make it!
You really do WANT to lose this weight, don't you Amy? Well, of course you do and that means you have the WILL to do it. Plus, God has already given you the POWER to lose it. He just leaves it in your hands to USE that power. Put the two together and you have the WILL--POWER you need to lose this weight!

Always remember that FOOD has NO power over you other than the power you choose to GIVE it. You must CHOOSE to not allow food and your weight to rule your life ANY longer. The big mistake most people make is to turn losing weight into a chore or an impossible task. It's NEITHER! Yes, you DO have to work for it. You have to EARN it. But that's true of just about anything else in life worth having, isn't it? But I also like to think of losing weight as an adventure. Just think, you'll be creating a brand NEW AMY and if that's not an adventure then tell me what is? Here's how you WIN this fight:

1)Get in charge and STAY in charge of your eating habits. (No big surprise for you there, right?) And one more time, you must NOT give food power over your life EVER again. YOU control the food and it does NOT control you, unless you LET it. YOU are the boss when it comes to what foods go into your body and it's not just about WHAT you eat, it's about how MUCH. You have got to watch those portion sizes. Food does not leap from the plate or the kitchen cabinets into your mouth. It's you who makes those decisions. How much do you want to WIN this fight huh, Amy?

2)You've GOT to start and stick with a dedicated EXERCISE program and make it a regular part of your life. You know how important exercise is for you. BUILD from where you are right now by challenging yourself to do a little bit more each day. You have GOT to keep that body of yours MOVING and make exercise Priority #1 for yourself. The more you do, the more you'll be ABLE to do! Exercise is a real win-win for you. It'll not only make your body stronger but make your MIND stronger. You'll discover that GOOD habits, like exercise, are just as hard to break as some of the bad ones you may have had in your life. Last but not least...

3)You have GOT to make sure your ATTITUDE stays strong and positive. And you REALLY need to work on this area of your life. Let there be NO more room for all of those doubts about what you CAN do, okay? Your attitude will help you as much as exercise and proper eating to win this fight, by losing. WEIGHT, that is!

Now, I'll ask again, how much do you want this Amy, really? A lot, right? Well, I want you to forget the past and concentrate on what you can do now. What matters now is the opportunity you have NOW to lose this weight, once and for all. Take it one step, one day and one POUND at a time! That brand new Amy wants into your life as much as you want her in it. Let her IN and don't let yourself down!

BELIEVE in yourself and, now that you have begun this fight, NEVER GIVE UP on YOU! I promise, I'll be cheering for you, all the way to your goal. Keep me posted on how GOOD you are doing, okay? And, one more time, Amy, you CAN do it!

Your Friend,

Richard


Yes, Richard is for real. I think finding this today gave me a boot in my butt... I just feel sooo lame knowing I'm like 10 pounds heavier than I was this time a year ago...

I do not want to be lame anymore...

I do not want to be lame anymore...

Leave for church in one hour? HA!

I need to shower, do my hair and some makeup, get dressed, get the kids dressed (NIGHTMARE) and see if I can coax Jason out of bed to go to church with us. We really need to go and all the sleeping he did last time didn't seem to help him any at all. Last nights meds made it hard to get out of bed this morning, so yeah, I am the epitomy of a cheap and easy looking woman right now, though I do have a bra on.

Faith came screaming "he's awake! He's awake!" I thought 'Wow! A self starter way to go Jason!' Then I asked Faith 'Who is? Where?" She chipperly responds while towing Duke 'Duke mom, right here!" *UGH*

Solemmejustellya - I just don't know if I have the umph in my junk to get moving for church today.

We will see what happens...

Two Shakes Short of....

$#!tty. Flat out. It's been a rough day and I noticed I am a super crab when I have little sleep. Last night I had all of three tiny hours. THREE! I've been a flipping wreck. At least I can admit it. So, I took two Ativan and I think I'm gonna call it a night.

Crap!

It's been a high strung day... just a mess of tears, tantrums, moody two year olds, and a crabby sleep deprived mother. I've resulted to locking up my fridge with kid proof things and the pantry too. The kids were raiding it several times a day and I got tired of finding half eaten food all over the place. Now, they will eat on a schedule and no grazing or stealing.

I got the garage mostly done this morning. I mean - there are a few hodge podge boxes but for the most part, it all makes sense and I could very well park a vehicle in the garage if I wanted to! Mission accomplished. Amazing what diet pills do for me, eh?

Going through boxes of memories was hard for me. I'd come across letters from family and friends while I was in bootcamp, or had knee surgery, or when I lived in Oklahoma. It was sweet to see the sentiment in it all and be grateful I have that history still. I still miss my grandma, and when I don't get a card from her in the mail this year, I think it will really hit me.

So sad, so sad.

I need to go to bed now.

Hope this finds you all very well!

Update, Version 2.0

So, since it's been ages since I last wrote anything in my blog, I am most certain I have lots of explaining to do. For me though, it's a rather laughable insight to the last (more than) week of my life. I will make a list so I don't forget to write about anything...

1. Underwriting
2. Keys!
3. The Firsts
4. Nails
5. Telemarketers! Ohhh how I despise you!
6. Internet Woes

So, just when you think that you're approved and you need no further paperwork to get your loan docs to go through, the "underwriter" has another hoop for us to jump through. I was certain that I was going to be told to sit, lay down and roll over, then given a biscuit for being a "good girl" and doing as commanded. No, really.

We got keys late Wednesday, June 11th and we were just excited to finally have a home to call our own. It's wierd when you have your own place because you want to make it cozy and at the same time are afraid to put nails in the walls to hang pictures or curtains. I'm almost through all the boxes we stored in the garage, and amazingly enough, we have like 4 miscellaneous boxes of just stuff. I told Jason last night, I think I'll hyper sort all the stuff into boxes of who it will belong to in 10 years, just in case I don't have time to get to it by then. Planning for the future, huh?

The firsts in the house... so exciting. I had, at one point, considered doing a poll of who thought who would be the first to color on the wall, spill on the new carpet, puke on the floor, etc. It's just interesting to see that nothing was the way I thought it was... KayLee Carey was part culprit in the first spill of water on the floor. This is funny because she's only 8 months old... Aubrey was the first to write on my beige walls with blue ink pen, and the dog we adopted from the humane society, DUKE, was the first to puke... TUNA FISH SANDWICH!!! YUCK! The things that make you go... *HURL*

I'm seriously considering having a few days a week dedicated to doing nails again out of my house. I love the fact I can interact with people that way and give them something that they really want. My perfectionism gets the best of me at times, but I'd rather something be really well done, than leave it not good enough for me. I was going through boxes last night til almost midnight, and came across a lot of the things I said I wish I had before I really got going, like my tip clipper, another set of cuticle nippers, two sets of cuticle tweezers, a metal pusher, my fingerbowl for manicures... it was pretty cool to see this stuff, but the best part was finding my medal from the nail show I did... I did a set of nails on my friend Robin at the Long Beach International Beauty Show and got a medal... pretty cool seeing as I was 16 and still a student...

So, after having my new phone number for a few days, every telemarketer on the planet has the best deal, only available for a limited time and they want to GIVE it to me at NO CHARGE! You know what I say to that? "Yes, I'm on the federal do not call list, please..." click - they hang up. If you are pestered by telemarketers, please visit www.donotcall.gov and take a minute to register all your phone numbers so the next time a sucker calls, they're easily off the phone, no lying needed. After about a month, all calls should come to a halt. Hope this helps, and if it does, pass it on!

And if things weren't bad enough, I have tempermental internet. It goes up and down about as good as a woman with hot flashes. It's just a big ol turd right now. I can barely get on my messenger without having to restart a conversation about FIVE THOUSAND times! Thankfully, the blogger autosaves my text so I don't have to worry about losing everything when it goes down, but it's so annoying. QWEST, IF YOU CAN HEAR ME - FIX THIS NOW!

Okay, I've gotta get out to the garage and sort while the unpackers and movers are still sleeping for a few more hours... those girls. Let me tell ya! Until next time, be Fierce!

The Divalicious Sunday Meetings

Let me first say, I hate going to church without Jason, and second, I really really hate church if I don't have Mandy to back me up. Aubrey was a pistol and a half today, flailing in the aisles and making me so embarassed. It wasn't enough to just not sit with mom. She had to go and investigate every baby in the room, and take off... We wound up in the foyer of the building until it was time for nursery. At least there she got to eat and wind herself down....

*sigh*

This being the last Sunday I would spend with Nampa 3rd Ward as a member of that congregation was so sad. They are probably the most accepting and lovely people I've been to church with in a long long while. It's alright though, I can still go visit them, huh?

I need to get so much done around here and tonight, Jason is double shifting. Tomorrow we do our final walk, and then HOPEFULLY we will close the day after. Just hoping things go smoothly this week for me. The last thing I need is any more bumps in the road...

We'll see what happens...

So, it didn't get any better...

Today, I spent cleaning the windows and the window tracks in my apartment, the baseboards and started packing up some more of my kitchen. The kids were in a constant state of mutiny and chaos. What's new huh?

As I write, Aubrey is behind me having probably the 5,342nd fit of the day today. I just know I'm in terrible 2's now! TERRIBLE, HORRIBLE, NO STINKING GOOD TWOS! She's so diva right now, it's not even laughable.

I hope that once the stress of this moving crap is over and we have our own places to sleep and can stay in one spot a while, we will be happy people again. Not all stressed out and bonkers. I tell ya, just a few more days... just a few.

On another note... I decided that packing my pantry back into grocery bags was a smart idea. Why not? I mean, that's how we get them home from the store, and it will be apparent where they belong when we move. So, ha!

I walked into the (former) kids bathroom today to detail clean with a toothbrush, and a smell in there brought back memories of visiting my grandma in Vegas. It made me stop and think of all the wonderful times I had at her place, the memories I will always have of her, and how much I miss her so. Closer to closing the house, now, even more than before, I wonder if my grandma is going to show up... somehow.

My mother will be here in a few weeks! I'm glad she'll be able to see my house before it's broken in by the kids. I'm really proud of it, and happy that we were finally able to buy something respectable enough for us to grow into. I think that was the biggest deciding factor in building... where are we gonna be in 10 years... how much space... etc. Glad we thought ahead.

I can't wait for next week... busy, chaotic but an end to this insanity at the apartments.

so if I lived yesterday...

Can I die today?!

There is a mutiny happening right now in my house. You see, Mandy bought Aubrey a tea set for her birthday present, and when Mandy arrived at the door with a present in hand, Faith assumed it was for her! It's been a rather rude awakening for Faith to know that it's not hers and she needs to learn to share. Like that's gonna happen.

So I decided to pack up some more stuff today, just because I can't do anything else really. I'm frustrated though. Being as short as I am, makes life UBER difficult to get stuff off of high shelves, clean those "hard to reach spots", and live to talk about it. Up and down a chair to pack SUCKS! Thankfully, this is the last time we will move for a decade. GAH!

On other news, we likely won't get keys until Wednesday now beause of paperwork issues. It's retarted. That leaves me barely a day to clean up this apartment and make it move in ready. HA! I know. Thankfully, I started packing and cleaning ahead of time, and I've nearly completed one bathroom, and almost got the back bedroom cleaned. YAHOOO! It's just gonna take forever to do because I'm the only one doing it. Today Jason double shifts, as well as tomorrow. Do I skip church? I am certain another mutiny will break out, hopefully between Mandy and I we can keep it under control.

Hrm, anything else? Probably not yet. I'm sure with at LEAST another 12 hours left in my day... life will become interesting enough to blog about!

Today, I lived!

I went over to help a friend this morning with her kids and what not, and shortly after 11:00 am Jason calls, he wants to go out to the mall, the kids are making him nuts, and be ready. (Ha! Really? Welcome to my world!)

So, we go to the mall, and if you know me like I know me, you know I'm a bargain hunter. I went to Dillards today and bought some new bathroom linens; the toilet covers (3) the things that go around the base of the toilet (2), a rug for the girls bathroom, and FOUR PLUSH Egyptian Cotton Towels, to die for. I spent 54.00!! FOR ALL THAT! SNAP! I know! Life was good. I figured I couldn't get stuff like that at Wal-Mart or Target for that price, so I went ahead and purchased them! YAHOOO! I'm tempted to go back for more!

Anything else... not yet. But this doesn't mean life won't get interesting later...

Aubrey's 2nd Birthday

Today, Aubrey turned two and I was glad to see we had the friends over we did for her party. Since we don't have family here, friends mean everything to us. No really, they do. Aubrey was so happy with all her presents and I was glad that they were things that she would play with and use!

I'm tired and worn out. I just need to get a second wind here. I'm thinking of getting in the shower, putting on some horrible Britney Spears and getting this house put together.

I guess I'll go for now. This was sure short today.

:)

So many things to talk about!

It's been three days since I last blogged and life has been so interesting around the Prather Monkey Exhibit.

Where to begin?

Faith, she's been not feeling well for like 5 days now, but I think we're finally on an upswing. It's been exhausting having to hear her whine all the time and be overly sensitive, but she's two, nearly three and what else is she supposed to do when she doesn't feel good.

Aubrey's birthday party got cancelled Monday. See above paragraph for reason. She turns two tomorrow and it's really blowing me away that she's already two. Thank goodness I'm not going to do labor again... it's sad though, looking at your youngest daughter and knowing, it's the end. They're only little for a little... She's recently started this thing with rubbing a tab of her fleece blanket under her nose while she goes to sleep. Each one of my girls has some strange thing to help soothe them to sleep, but they never picked it up as late as Aubrey has.

Grace is out on summer vacation and I don't know what to do with her most of the time. The programs at the YMCA are expensive and I don't want to fork out money like that and pay the travel costs to go get her from there.

This morning was hilarious. Let me explain.

Jason and I had no sleep last night because Faith kept crying out for us to fix her bed, get her more water, etc. We were a mess. I think I got like 4 solid hours of sleep last night, and that resulted in my recent two hour nap... oh it's good to nap! Anyway - back to the story - the kids were all "STARVING" and had to eat right then. So I whip up a batch of whole grain pancakes and start cooking. It's not long before they decide that they're all full and I have tons of batter left. I decided to cook the rest of the batter while cleaning out my pantry and listening to Britney Spears. Yes, I was listening to Britney Spears and singing along, bra-less in my pantry, stinking like I had not seen a shower in a few days. But that's good... it's birth control! HA HA HA! I proceeded to clean and sort the pantry while baking pancakes, and after burning two because I was forgetting that I was cooking, I resulted to stopping the baking and continue the obnoxious singing and cleaning.

After I had cleaned a while, we get a call from our lender that we need to be in Boise by noon... and it's 10:30, all the kids need showers, clothes, diapers, etc... and we have to do this in a hurry, and take care of our hygienic needs... Yes, I finally showered... It was the craziest I've been in a hurry here lately.

Needless to say, we arrived a bit early, and the girls got to drawing on the desk of the person whom the office belonged to. Yes, drawing on it... not on the paper. Fabulous. I know. So, we find out today that our payment is going to be right at 1300.00 a month, which is more than we planned, but we'll get along fine. Jason is doing really well at work and picks up overtime pretty frequently, so I think we'll do just fine.

Yesterday we went furniture shopping. We went to two stores, but not before a vulgar name calling session ensued. You see, when Jason has his mind set on something, he's set. The first store we went to, we found an inexpensive set and were going to go look at dining room tables. We decided that we liked these particular items, but should look elsewhere. For some reason, we got to bickering in the car and it was an all out war. We used to fight more often than this, usually resulting in me getting out of the car and walking, but we've done quite well so far. (I hope you're laughing at this.)

We go to store number two and I put the salesman through the number crunching ringer. I mean, I really make him work for his pay. We decided we liked a red couch, chair and loveseat set a whole lot, and the same table we found at the other place was cheaper. So, 1240.00 later, furnishings are headed to our home soon.

This just in... Aubrey has managed to get crap on the carpet twice today. Whenever she is done pooping, she takes off the diaper, resulting in stepping in poop, and walks away. I've got to go clean carpets. I will have to blog more later... *sigh*

Oh, I hate vomit...

The summer flu is upon us and I am stressed out. I'm thinking this current plague came from the park I mentioned in an earlier blog as our friends who went with us also were plagued by the same flu just one day prior.

As tradition would have it, I am used to having sick or miserable children on their birthdays, and I guess, traditions are going to roll. Aubrey's 2nd birthday party is tomorrow, and if she errupts tonight, I'm in trouble. I've bought most of the food and am sure that people are planning on coming. I would hate to call it off, but this time, the show wouldn't go on.

This is puzzling though. We've all had the flu vaccine, so I thought we would have been okay... maybe the bug mutated enough that we didn't realize some of us got it and others didn't... I pray her party can go on.

So, this morning, Jason was lying in bed with Faith and I hear him screaming for me to come. When I walk in, Faith is errupting like Mt. St. Helens. All over the bedding I just washed a few days before and herself. I had to clean Faith up and get the vomit out of her hair, he had to clean the sheets. The vomit stench was putrid. Just putrid. I'm in the second phase of cleaning up the linens. Round one of bed sheet and duvet cover are done, I have to move second load into the dryer, and start washing load three. So much for caught up....

Needless to say, we didn't attend church as we had once wanted to today, but I think we were much safer at home, with our barf cups at the ready. *sigh* I wonder what miracles this week holds for us?