Quiet Moments

Today I went to Red Robin for lunch and had a Turkey Burger - Protien Style *GASP* with a side salad. I don't miss the bread anymore, but I did savor a few bites of my ice cream sundae. Which by the way was fabulous. The rucous made at the restraunt today by the staff was so embarassing. I'm grateful though, that I am alive, and I've been given so much. Or that I've allowed myself to believe I deserve such great things. Maybe a little of both.



It's in these quiet moments that I find myself feeling pretty lonely and sad. Jason is working on my birthday and I'm here with the little girls watching them string foam beads on necklaces. It will be a few more hours until Mandy comes over, and I think that will be nice to have company. I was contemplating the fact that I think my birthday is embarassing more than it makes me sad. Maybe it's because I'm not the attention type - anymore - and I kind of like blending in. I feel all too lucky to just have what I do, that gifts are just extra, I guess. Terrible of me, huh? I don't mean to sound ungrateful, acutally just the opposite. When you feel like you have so much... Meh. I'll let this one rest.

My friends and family, I miss you on my birthday, but know I am carrying you in my thoughts and heart today across the miles.