I couldn't sleep last night. Nothing new. I'm under huge stress right now and GOOD GRIEF... if my mind would just shut up for a while and quit over thinking things, I'd be alright. That's how I've been here lately. After Aubrey (baby #3 - hopefully the last) I've become an analytical-overthinking-crazy woman! Something just changed. Back to the orginal train of thought... I de-rail often... no rail road pun intended.
I was up with my dad last night, watching tv. For a few hours actually. My dad and I never were close or cozy. He's just not that type. But, at least last night we got to watch something like 5 hours of TV together. It started with the show TapOut on cable's VS station. We watched a fight and he got all excited with the stiff hands and holding his breath like he does when he watches any sport. Then we watched Survivor Man on the Science channel... Then we watched the story about the "Real Rain Man" Kim Peek. PHENOMINAL! Just amazing.
Then my pops went to bed and I was up for another hour watching stuff about Galileo, Newton, Einstein, and a new guy Herring. All about how energy/force in the universe is... Trying to figure out how things came to be in the heavens. The math and science behind it all drove men mad, just absolutely insane to find the answers. I'm sure to God, it's just no big deal... he probably enjoys seeing what men come up with to explain his existence, minus the fact that he doesn't exist.
Bright minds... never really been book smarty with Math - in fact - HATED it. But I can run percentages, fractions, and balance books all day long... Something I acquired as an adult. I think it was a means to gain control in my life. Like going shopping, if I had a budget, I could figure the sale price, total it all and I'm usually within a few bucks at costco, and under a dollar elsewhere. Or if I was baking, I can double or half something in moments... or whatever the calculation needs to be. I remember my math teacher trying to say something about Cups and Cookies... never made sense then, but it does now! I guess it's all with how things relate to other things while figuring the fraction. I'm a numbers freak... well - moreso a blanced numbers freak. I like to know exactly what I am working with. I hate getting pennies back at the store too... pennies get sucked up, lost, etc.... they're not really worthwhile money to me...
So, probably enough rambling for one day. I guess I'll go watch Aubrey again. She's not been well since a wasp bite on her foot.... :0(
All the joy... all the vomit. Would I trade it? Maybe for a moment.... but I bet I'd be an indian giver and take it back!
I read somewhere - sorry I don't remember where it was - but that does not really matter --- anyway, when stung by a wasp or a bee put a penny on the sting --- takes the sting right out. I tried it - it works... at least it did here. So you see those pennies really are worth something... there is also a poem floating about cyberspace called Pennies from Heaven - well worth lookng up, ( http://www.ziplo.com/Pennies.html )and the read. It will make you think of pennies in a much different light.
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