Don't you hate it when?

I know that some of us that read this blog, attend LDS services on Sunday, so this might very well make lots of sense to those of you who go. And to those of you who don't, I'll try to detail well enough to give you the sense of complete and utter embarassment I suffered yesterday, THREE TIMES!

Argh!

So, I went shopping on Saturday with Gretchen and bought a new dress for church. I didn't realize until Sunday morning and taking a "progress" picture you could see through the entire dress! *MORTIFIED* In an attempt to save myself on Sunday, I searched through the tubs of "too small" clothes in the garage and after about the fifteenth bin, I found a slip. As a matter of fact, it was the WHITE slip I wore when I worked at See's Candies. I really didn't care that it hung out of the top of my dress, so long as you couldn't see through my dress. Tradgedy adverted, or so I thought.

Before heading out the door for church, I took a Loracet as I had already had max dose for migraine medication and I was in miserable pain. I had to go to church guys, I promise. I needed to know that God knew what he was doing when he asked me to be the "wolf leader" in the Cub Scouts program.... (I wish it were Vampires or something, I'm not team Jacob afterall)

About two minutes from the church - okay - really - like 15 seconds from my driveway and 2 minutes to church, the pain killer set in. I remember looking at Jason saying, "Honey, I took some good medicine, and I might be out of it...." and that's about all I remember. Yes, I still attended church in my not even aware of my feet existing below me, state.

Because we arrived to church 5 minutes late, we were on the 12th row of overflow seats that so convieniently sits on a hardwood basketball floor. My children cannot help themselves from running around, flashing their panties and announcing that they need to matriculate -pee-pee- loud enough for our dear Bishop to hear about 100 yards away. Fabulous. So, because I cannot walk or barely even keep my eyes open at this point, I send Grace out to the bathroom with Faith to go tinkle. They return only to parading with their loudest set of clippity clappity feet on the wood floor! *let me die now*

As I fade in and out of conciousness during fast Sunday, I know there is no way that I can manage any more church. I cannot walk well, let alone have a coherent conversation or understanding of the things around me. My husband makes the executive decision to get me "set apart" before we head for home. Great, I look like a drunk in front of my clergy...

So I stumble in the office and the look of - I don't know - washes over the face of the two men who await to do this "setting." "Does this happen a lot?" said one of the suited up men. "Yes, and sometimes one out of three makes me wind up in the ER on pain meds..." - Does anyone else realize how STUPID THAT SOUNDS?! "Huh, really, that's too bad..." Meanwhile, Aubrey is screaming and writhing around as she is due - well over due - for her nap and we'd like a moment of silence.... Yeah, I don't remember much, but I guess I'm the one for the job.

I recall sitting at the curb outside church waiting for Jason to pick me up because walking was tragic for me. I'm sure at this point, anyone driving through the lot and staring at my direction was probably digging the religion that was hanging out... Yes, I'm sure. I crumpled up in a ball in the front seat of the car and four hours later, woke up in my bed... dizzy and tired.

Hey - I guess at least the migraine is gone, right? If I can't laugh at myself, who will - oh yes, everyone who reads this, right?

More don't you hate it whens at http://blokthoughtsnmore.blogspot.com/